Dress For The Job You Want, Not The Job You Have

"Seriously, how awesome do I look right now!?!"

So as the rebels press onward in Libya and take/don't take Tripoli and capture/don't capture Gaddafi's sons and are winning/aren't winning, it's apparent that the media doesn't know what exactly is going on over there. Meanwhile, the fighting continues to ramp up in Syria, but details of said fights are almost non-existent. And while President Obama was eager to lob some explosives at Gaddafi right away, he's been less eager to do so with Syria's President Bashar al-Assad. Why?

Well, as it turns out, the reasoning is quite simple: al-Assad doesn't look like the crazy dictator that Muammar Gaddafi does. Gaddafi comes across as a wanna-be celebrity dictator with his designer shades and his elaborate robes. If you didn't know any better, you would think al-Assad was heading to a job interview. With a clean-cut look and a nice suit, the only knock on him is his freakishly long neck (seriously, look at that thing). While his time may come, for now his comparatively normal looks have kept him alive.

President Bashar al-Assad

Of course, this is a crazy theory, right? Right? Well, it's happened before. Let's take a quick look at history.

Not long ago, the U.S. was faced with a similar quandary - should we take out Iraq or Iran? Both were big on threats and neither were strangers to UN sanctions. Both nations were led by crazy, cruel dictators (or at least quasi-dictators) and were rumored to have weapons of mass destruction. When it was all said and done, who did the U.S. end up attacking?

Who are you gonna bomb, the guy with the charming smile or the homeless guy on the right?

You got it, the crazy looking one.

I guess the lesson for all you aspiring dictators out there is this: Don't dress the part. If you look like a crazy dictator, you'll get bombed like a crazy dictator. A nice suit and some attention to grooming will go a long ways toward not getting blown up.